Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Thoughts While Watching Sailor Moon Crystal: Episode Two


Aw, episode one was ad-free for whatever reason. This has ads.

Second year of middle school in Japan, that's roughly 13-14, yes? Same grade as Utena.

Um... an IQ of 300 is impossible. Like, literally impossible.

Um. Wow. Ami is uncomfortably hot in this art style. *reminds self she's 14*

What. the. fuck. Oh, commercial. The way the characters jumped out of the compact, I was a little confused for a moment.

When Beryl refers to "our great ruler," does she mean herself or..? (Don't answer that.)

Maybe the Dark Kingdom just isn't very creative with titles, since they have four kings overseen by a queen. Maybe every single rank of nobility is called either "King," or "Queen."

Seeing a small cat refer to "The Evil" is giving me Sluggy Freelance flashbacks.

Wait, is Sailor Moon not the princess? I'm confused.

I... what? Where is Luna?

Haha, the nerd girl is a Virgo. And by "ha ha" I mean "fuck you."

Crystal Seminar is a villain plot, I'm guessing.

Aw, Ami took her glasses off. She looked way better with them, as most people do.

Oh my god, does Usagi have a thing for Ami? I could get behind this.

Usagi: Horrible cheater at video games. Also, Ami's lucky she picked that game and not the one next to it, if she'd beaten the high score on that one she'd be recruited to pilot a starfighter against evil aliens.

Here at the Crystal Seminar, we like to prepare young people for their inevitable future of sitting quietly in cubicles, typing away at computers and having their life essence drained to feed a dark power.

Okay, so who is the dark-haired girl hanging with Usagi and Naru? Is she a plant?

Japanese print ads are so busy by Western design standards. Newspapers, too.

No seriously, who wears a tux just walking around the street?

I... what? How did Usagi activate the brainwashing without brainwashing?

Wait, the video game just had a power-up for Usagi in it? I'd complain that this is video game logic, but... video game.

Does Ami's pen have powers too?

I like to think Usagi just THREW Luna at evil teacher-lady.

I really do feel like this transformation sequence is a huge improvement on the old one, but at the same time, I don't want to see all of it every episode. I hope we eventually get a shortened version or it changes up or something.

Ugh, super-whining again. Seriously, WTF show.

Damn, only the second episode and already Sailor Moon's getting her ass kicked. But I guess that's necessary so the new scout can save the day.

Once again, I'd like to point out that Luna gives her recruits EVEN LESS information about what's going on and what they're getting into than Kyubey does.

Oh, interesting, Usagi is Justice and Ami is Intelligence.

Bah, stop upstaging everyone, Tuxedo Jackass. You're even worse than Angel.

Moon Tiara brutal murder count: 2/2.

Ami and Usagi want each other SO BAD you guys. They're all blushes and smiles and handholding, I flat-out refuse to not ship them.

This ad for Crunchyroll Devices is reminding me of the thing they keep showing at movie theaters from MPAA about how movies deserve to be watched on the big screen, not the little. It's an anti-piracy ad, but it makes me laugh because it works just as well as anti-paying for movie rentals, DVD purchases, and streaming services.

Ah, image of our next recruit. I have a feeling she is going to be one of the characters most different from the Abridged Series version.

This was rather spectacularly better than the first episode, but I'm not going to actually LIKE this show until they get rid of at least one of super-whining or Tuxedo Fedora swooping in to save the day.

11 comments:

  1. "Same grade as Utena." - I wonder why. :-p

    "Um... an IQ of 300 is impossible. Like, literally impossible." - It's presented as school gossip, so it's from an unreliable source. That said, fictional examples of impossibly inflated IQs can be found anywhere.

    "What. the. fuck. Oh, commercial. The way the characters jumped out of the compact, I was a little confused for a moment." I didn't get any commercials; I have a paid account. D-:

    "Maybe the Dark Kingdom just isn't very creative with titles, since they have four kings overseen by a queen. Maybe every single rank of nobility is called either "King," or "Queen." - The Japanese word for Beryl's generals is "Shittenou", which means "Four Heavenly Kings" - a Buddhist concept: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Heavenly_Kings

    The word "tennou" by itself can mean "emperor" or "heavenly sovereign". But you may be onto something with the nobility rank thing...

    "Wait, is Sailor Moon not the princess? I'm confused." - I can explain, but it involves 20-year old spoilers that have become "common" knowledge. Would that be a problem?

    "I... what? Where is Luna?

    Haha, the nerd girl is a Virgo. And by "ha ha" I mean "fuck you."" - I must not remember these scenes.

    "Oh my god, does Usagi have a thing for Ami? I could get behind this." - Tip of the iceberg, tip of the iceberg.

    "Usagi: Horrible cheater at video games. Also, Ami's lucky she picked that game and not the one next to it, if she'd beaten the high score on that one she'd be recruited to pilot a starfighter against evil aliens."

    Since this is as good a place as any to say it, the initial concept of Ami was that she was going to be a robot/cyborg. Her uncanny skill in the arcade game is most likely a leftover from this.

    "Okay, so who is the dark-haired girl hanging with Usagi and Naru? Is she a plant?" You mean the random schoolgirl? They're just background characters.

    "I... what? How did Usagi activate the brainwashing without brainwashing?"

    It was that way in the manga to; at least in the Sailor V manga it depicted the main character being affected.

    "Wait, the video game just had a power-up for Usagi in it? I'd complain that this is video game logic, but... video game." - If the show keeps following the manga, then trust me, it gets worse.

    "Once again, I'd like to point out that Luna gives her recruits EVEN LESS information about what's going on and what they're getting into than Kyubey does." - This actually comes up in the manga. Well, not the Kyubey part.

    "Bah, stop upstaging everyone, Tuxedo Jackass. You're even worse than Angel." He did this all the time in the first anime. All the time.

    "Ah, image of our next recruit. I have a feeling she is going to be one of the characters most different from the Abridged Series version." The manga version of this character was different from the version in the first anime - so I'm interested in seeing what happens.

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    1. Missed some things:

      "Seeing a small cat refer to "The Evil" is giving me Sluggy Freelance flashbacks."

      The word Luna uses is "youma", which is the name of the monsters of the week for this story arc. Or at least they were in the original anime.

      And you were talking about Luna on the computer there. Yeah, she has a magic computer terminal.

      Delete
    2. The Japanese word for Beryl's generals is "Shittenou", which means "Four Heavenly Kings"

      Yeah, I assumed as much. Variants of them show up in (among other things) Fushigi Yuugi, Gurren Lagann, and Kill la Kill. But since I don't speak Japanese I couldn't be sure, thanks for confirming.

      it involves 20-year old spoilers that have become "common" knowledge. Would that be a problem?

      Normally no, but for purposes of this experiment, let's say yes, it's a problem. Watching Sailor Moon Crystal without seeing the original anime or reading the manga is apparently quite rare, so let's see how long we can maintain my ignorance.

      the initial concept of Ami was that she was going to be a robot/cyborg.

      Oh, sure, as if I weren't uncomfortably and inappropriately attracted to her already.

      The word Luna uses is "youma", which is the name of the monsters of the week for this story arc.

      But... "youma" means "monster" or "ghost," doesn't it? Couldn't they have been a bit more specific than "The Evil"?

      WHY DOES THE TALKING CAT HAVE A MAGIC COMPUTER

      HOW DOES SHE TYPE SHE HAS PAWS

      OR IS THAT THE MAGIC PART?

      *implodes*

      Delete
    3. "But... "youma" means "monster" or "ghost," doesn't it? Couldn't they have been a bit more specific than "The Evil"?"

      The subtitles are not very good.

      Delete
  2. Does anybody familiar with the original manga have any idea why the subs apparently think it is appropriate to use quotation marks when referring to the Legendary Silver Crystal? The most recent translation of the manga also did it, and as a translator-in-training, it annoys me to no end, particularly since I keep wanting the characters to make the corresponding finger gesture whenever they say it, and getting annoyed when they don't.

    Something I noticed this episode is that Ami's transformation sequence is essentially the original anime's with an added coat of paint, which I find baffling. Given that the intention appears to be to follow the manga as closely as possible, the fact that the producers appear to have given up one of the few opportunities they had to make something of their own mildly offends me. Then again, given how ugly the aesthetics of those sequences is, perhaps that's for the best.

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    1. I can't read Japanese, so take this with a grain of salt: Looking at the original Japanese manga, the Silver Crystal's name, when mentioned, is put in hook brackets. (At least I think that's what they're called). If I understand correctly, hook brackets are equivalent of quotation marks. I don't know for certain, but I get the impression that "Silver Crystal" is in hook brackets to indicate to the Japanese reader that it's an important object/word. (I hope someone knows what it really means).

      The fact that the hook brackets are being translated as quotation marks suggests that someone is doing an overly literal translation. For the anime, it's been hypothesized that the subber is a native Japanese speaker, and may not understand that English Does Not Work That Way. But for the manga it makes no sense - unless I am wrong, the translator is not Japanese. Maybe they were just asked to put the quotation marks in there by people who didn't know any better.

      Delete
    2. There are, of course, native English speakers who believe you can use quotation marks for emphasis, but I would hope none of them have a job as a subtitler. (They're all too busy making the signs in my local supermarket...)

      Delete
  3. Whenever you watch the first episode of a show, Crunchyroll gives you the subscriber experience, i.e. higher resolution and no ads.

    As you may have noticed, more than 90% of the ads Crunchyroll serves are for Crunchyroll, so either they aren't able to sell much ad time or the subscriptions are worth sufficiently more than ad pay that they'd rather push the subs as hard as they can.

    I don't know about the Manga, but olde time anime Tuxedo Mask is infamous for routinely throwing a rose into a fight, saying something pretentious, and making no further contribution. As often as not he wouldn't even stay to see how things turned out. The first time he actually participated in a battle, he fainted from exhaustion.

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    1. I don't know about the Manga, but olde time anime Tuxedo Mask is infamous for routinely throwing a rose into a fight, saying something pretentious, and making no further contribution. As often as not he wouldn't even stay to see how things turned out.

      The evidence that the main difference between movie!Buffy and TV!Buffy is that Joss Whedon watched Sailor Moon somewhere in between continues to mount.

      Delete
  4. If the music video for the full version of the opening theme is any indication, the faces get slightly better, but the CGI remains awkward.

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  5. Given the zodiac signs of the rest of the cast, I'm pretty sure Ami was made a Virgo largely because it's ruled by Mercury. (Bit of an All There in the Manual sort of thing.)

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